Your funniest/most interesting cricketing stories

Ljp86

Well-Known Member
Staff member
Your funniest/most interesting cricketing stories

I'm sure there's some funny cricketing stories out there for all of us cricket tragics who play on the weekends during that time of the year wherever you are. Please feel free to post some stories on here from your playing days and weekly adventures. @|

To get us going i'll share a few.


Story 1


My first ever season of senior cricket was played with our old coach from juniors (who was our captain) as well as a bunch of others guys i played with in juniors as well, mixed in with a couple of guys who I hadn't met until I started training at the club. This game was our second and my first ever game of two-day senior cricket as we had played a one-day match the week before.

Our opponents were Doubleview and they decided to bat first. They batted pretty slowly and we had them all out for about 120 halfway through the third session. I opened the bowling and had 0/18 from nine overs, not a bad return but could have a couple of wickets if things had gone my way. Anyway, it was our turn to bat and we soon slipped into trouble, stumbling to about 3/30ish before an old Commodore crawled its way onto the curb and up onto some grass next to the road. The park we played at was small with a big enbankment shortening the boundary on one side and some practice nets cutting part of the other side. The grass was pretty spongy so scoring runs wasn't easy.

Anyway, this commodore pulled up onto the grass, smoke starting to pour out of the engine. It pretty much died on the grass, not far from where we sitting which was next to a toilet block and a small canteen area. A young guy comes out and looks under the bonnet, not realising that the smoke is getting worse by the minute. He eventually moves away but sticks his head into the backseat to look at a few things. The smoke is getting worse and is really black now, pretty dark too. Our captain (who is a cop) starts yelling at him, telling him to get out of the car. He doesn't hear so more of us started yelling at him with one of the parents starting to move toward the car to pull him out. Meanwhile, the game was still going and I was scoring so I couldn't really take my eyes off the game for too long but I still had a pretty good view of what was going on. Suddnely, the car catches on fire and the guy in the car realises and high-tails out of there, running off with some stuff, leaving the car which is now burning sitting there on the grass. Our skipper then tells everyone to run around to the other side of the toilet block in case the fuel tank explodes which would really make things interesting. Soon we hear sirens and the fire engines show up, putting out the car which is now burning quite well. Play had stopped now with all of the players on the pitch, watching this burning car get put out. Our captain then grinned and pipes up "I bet this is the only time that anyone has said 'fire stopped play'."

The car got put out and we went back to playing for a remaining few minutes of the day. We went onto win, one of our batters finished stranded on 99 not out after the number 11 was clean bowled the next week.



Story 2


The next season the side I was in was playing in the one-day competition, 35 overs each, 1:15pm start-time. It was a tough initiation as we were playing in division one of the one-day comp where textbook cricket shots weren't exactly the stroke of choice and there were many sloggers who favoured long on and cow corner. Pretty disheartening for some young guys still new to senior cricket who bowl good line and length yet see the ball disappear for four.

Our game was against Tuart Hill in the city who were also struggling, in poorer form than us. The ground was smallish on one side but big on the other and it was quick so runs were pretty easy to get. They scored about 185 off their 35 overs so we were going to have to bat well to win. Due to the nature of the comp, only the best grades get two umpires and we only had one so one person from the batting side had to go square-leg. On this occasion, it was "Ducky's" turn (no, not his real name and no, nickname is not for obvious reasons either), one of the more interesting people at the club and also one of my best friends. The best way to describe Ducky is that he doesn't think before he speaks really but he is a good friend nonetheless.

Anyway, Ducky goes out to square leg looking like he's walking the red carpet at another shitty Nicole Kidman film premiere. He's also wearing a pair of sunglasses to make him look extra cool. It's the end of the over and the umpire changes ends, fielders cross etc, the usual things happening. One of our players plays the ball out to the boundary and they go back for the second, the throw is good and he's in trouble, the keeper has the bails off, the batsman looks gone and there's an appeal to the square leg umpire. Wait, where is the square leg umpire? Where's Ducky? We look in amusement and hysterics as Ducky is at the end where the umpire is, looking at the same crease and the same set of stumps. Our whole team piss themselves laughing for about five minutes as the umpire inquizitively asks him why he is at the end same end as him and why he failed to change ends at the end of the previous over. The other team start to have a crack at him too, asking him why the hell he wasn't at the right end in language too crude for this post. I suspect they knew the batsman was out as well. With no-one to make a call, our guy was given not out and continued batting with the other team giving Ducky some very dirty looks.

Ducky comes off at the end of the over and someone else goes out in his place. Everyone is still laughing, still is disbelief at what happened. We ended up winning the game with about an over to spare, the batters who was "out" ended up making about 30-odd. It's still one of the funniest things I've seen in a cricket game to this day.


Story 3

My last one to start us off involves the same team from story two and the same opposition. Towards the end of the season at the same ground, we played each other again. This time we batted first in an attempt to set a good score first up.

Anyway, we were going along at a quick pace when things started brewing on the field. One of the fielders and the keeper were having a bit of a discussion but nothing happened initially. Soon after, they were at it again but arguing this time, the fielder was being a bit lazy, letting through some fours at short third man and the keeper wasn't too pleased. The keeper then let a few byes through a short time later so the fielder retaliated accordingly. The keeper then let another bye through so the fielder again had a go at him. This time, the keeper turned around to look at the guy who was still at short third man and flicked his gloves to the floor, marching over to him with his fists up ready to fight!!! They ended up pushing each other for a bit, the keeper wanted to rip the fielder's head off but their teammates managed to calm them down and play continued, not before our side went into hysterics, not quite able to believe what was going on.

The fielder turned out to be one of their opening batters. He go out early on and copped shit from the rest of his side cause he has been acting like a clown for most of the day after continuing to carry on like a pork chop after things were settled down in the initial confrontation with the keeper. He ended up packing up his stuff and leaving after he got out. Turned out he was into bodybuilding and used steroids.



So, that's what I have. Please feel free to post your stories, whether they be funny or just quite interesting. @|
 
Re: Your funniest/most interesting cricketing stories

I'm a foundation member of the Dongara Cricket Club and in our second year, ( 1991 from memory), we made the Grand Final of the B grade in the Geraldton competition.
Over the course of those two seasons we built up a fierce rivalry with our eventual grand final opponents, (nearly all of our games were nail biters). Nothing too nasty, just some heated sledging and gamesmanship. However, we always had a beer and a laugh together after the game.
Our opposition , (whose team name completely escapes my memory at present), were made up of aboriginal guys in the main. All but two of them handled the banter with aplomb, however this pair always crossed the line and had to be sanctioned by their Captain, or the umpire, (if we were lucky enough to have one).
The big day arrives and we head up to Geraldton, (65km's) in convoy, together with what we thought was a decent supporter following of about 50, including our teams wives and girlfriends.
On arrival we were found to be severely outnumbered, with at least 300 opposition supporters already in attendance. Goony bags, (cask wine for our overseas visitors), were being destroyed at a rapid rate, and a visit to the public toilet required breathing apparatus in order to survive the ganga smoke.
Everything was cool though as everyone was respectful and happy.
They win the toss and decide to bat. One of the troublemakers is their opening batsman and he tries a sneaky leg bye off the thigh pad on the leg side from the second ball of the day. I was the Dongara wicket-keeper and somehow managed to grab the ball and pinged the stumps down from nearly side on, (complete and utter fluke), and run his partner out by about a yard. No question with the decision, he was well short of his ground.
The square leg umpy, ( we got 2 for grand finals), puts up his finger and all hell breaks loose. The not out batsmen screams F***ING CHEATING WHITE C**** at both myself and the umpire involved. The dismissed batsman refuses to walk and the crowd, well their supporters at least, are bellowing for blood....especially mine and the umpires.
Thankfully cooler heads than mine prevailed and, after some rather unsavoury abuse from both sides and the crowd, the opposition skipper came onto the field and settled the protagonist down and ordered the dismissed batsman from the ground.
We were, however, in the midst of a tinder box by then and it was only a matter of time before it sparked a bushfire. Myself, and the square leg umpire, (who was tiny old bloke who was closer to 70 than 60), were marked men from then on, and the crowd were certainly letting us know all about it, promising us that they were going to kick the crap out of us after the game.
That can have a rather unsettling effect on ones nerves and I promptly dropped a sitter in the next over.
Things settled down a bit and we eventually dismissed them for around 160. It was a 50 a side over one day format. Though every dismissal, even the clean bowled decisions, were met with howls of derision from an increasingly intoxicated and growing opposition crowd. ( The coppers later estimated the crowd at 500 at its height, so the bush telegraph must have kicked in about the potential for a smash at the cricket.
The other protagonist from the opposition happened to be their opening bowler. He was very quick for country standards and loved chin music and blatantly racist sledging in his native tongue. The problem was that most of us spoke “blackfella” as well as he did and were none too pleased to called a white c*** over and over again.
He knocked over our two openers pretty quickly and, as I was second drop, it was my turn to face the music. Our team and supporters were by this stage being protected by the police, all 4 of them. This obviously didn't stop a couple of bottles raining down on me when I left the huddle to go out in the middle.
I was lucky enough to get a few, including a hook for 6 off the opening bowler which I stuck up him in his own tongue, and when I was dismissed we were sitting pretty on 5 for 130 odd with 15 overs to go.
Is is fair to say that I didn't receive much polite applause from the crowd on my return.

Our whole innings had been peppered with quite ridiculous shouts for lbw and caught behinds, to the point of it being intimidation of the umpire with bowlers and fieldsmen right in their faces bellowing with mock rage. However, to their great credit, the umpires stood firm and did an amazing job considering the circumstances. They couldn't call the game off for fear of crowd retaliation and the police were hesitant to act for the same reason.
The very next over after my dismissal, it was on again. With their opening bowler screaming for an lbw that wouldn't have hit a second set of stumps.
Not out says the poor, little old umpire.
Right fist to the face goes the bowler.
Oh shit, go us.
Pandemonium ensues.
To a man we raced onto the field in the hope of protecting the umpire(s) before he was seriously injured.
Of course the opposition supporters did the same and a full blown riot erupted.
I don't remember much apart from being kicked squarely in the groin and trying to cover up as fists and feet came at me from all angles.
I woke up, covered in blood, in the back of our Captains Toyota Troop carrier doing about 140 kmh on its way to hospital. Every, and I mean every, window was smashed. Two star pickets, (steel fencing posts for the uninitiated), had pierced the cabin and everyone, (there was about 13 of us in there), was white as a ghost and deathly silent.
After the fact, I found out that both umpires had been badly bashed but would be ok. Our opening bowlers wife, who was heavily pregnant, had been hip and shouldered from behind in a truly cowardly act, but would be ok. Everyone of our team were nursing cuts and bruises, and all to a man, were sure that someone was going to get killed that day. I copped a hairline skull fracture, two broken fingers and the loss of 3 teeth.
Apparently it only lasted a few minutes before the coppers, with the help of batons and pepper spray, and a few sensible people from both sides retained order.
Many players from the opposition were charged and given varying bans, including life, and we needed a full police escort when attending the tribunal as witnesses.
Criminal charges were also laid, but I am unsure of their outcome.
We made the headlines on the regional television news,(GWN) and, of course, all the the other media.
We were awarded the win on the basis of unbecoming conduct on behalf of the opposition. But it was hollow victory..
This story is true, every bloody word of it. I swear to that on my children's lives.



Cricket...the gentleman's game!!

Not that day it wasn't



P.S. Apologies for the length.
P.P.S. tl;dr
 
Re: Your funniest/most interesting cricketing stories

Great idea for a thread.

Lol, the second story would have been so hilarious.

I've only played a season and a half of senior cricket, so I haven't experienced much but here goes:

Story 1:

We played some bogan team, we bowled them out for 200 odd on short-ish ground. The next week, when we were batting, I went square leg umpire for the first bit. There was an appeal where our opener dived for the crease, I called it not out (it may have been out but the dive was massive, really hard to call, guys on the boundary said it was 50-50). The guy who threw it then yelled "WHAT!?!?! THAT'S OUT. WHAT THE ****. ARE YOU ****ING KIDDING ME? THAT'S OUT. I just stood there, I'm a 15 year old kid, and I was playing 4ths at the time.

Then our other opener got out, the new batsman came in and got dropped first ball. The bowler (the same one who told me last week to stop sledging [it was hardly sledging...] and just keep it to enthusiasm) went down the pitch and told the batsman (same age as me), "oh you're shit". The batsman then went on to absolutely smash the bowler, he got like 20 off the next over and ended up making 70.

The day went on, we needed like 22 to win when I came in, 8 down but still with a batsman in. With 20 to get the batsman got out. Me and the number 11 were in, needing 20 with like 13 overs to go. We went through a lot of maidens, just getting the odd 2. Then I edged one, the keeper dropped it, then the slip dropped it, and it went for four.
and I was dropped another time at silly mid off. We need 1 off the last over, and the tool mention previously was bowling. I was on strike, there were 3 dots and I was so nervous, everything was keeping really low. 4th ball actually bounced a bit and I hit a cover drive for 4. It felt amazing to hit the winning runs off that idiot.

Story 2:

Our home umpire is kinda, err interesting. It can be frustrating but in the end it does result in some pretty funny stories. One time we had one of our older batsmen in, they appealed for LBW and the ump gave it out. The batsman just stood there and was like "I hit it..." and stayed there, umpire didn't see what was wrong with that so he let him stay. He ended up making a ton IIRC.

Another time I came on first change. My first ball was pretty loose, short and just down the leg side. The batsman tried to glance it but hit it to the keeper. Everyone behind the stumps went up straight away, I kinda half appealed because I couldn't really see it. Anyway the umpire just stood there, didn't give us anything. Everyone was certain he hit it, and they were like wtf? We all pretty much turned around and went back to our spots, and then I hear the keeper start celebrating, and the ump has given him out like 20 seconds after we stopped appealing. I've got a video of it, it's priceless.
 
Re: Your funniest/most interesting cricketing stories

Ian Bells hairstyles - what a ******** that bloke looks, even the commentators on the tele rip the piss out of him - he's an embarrassing example of an Englishman.
 
Re: Your funniest/most interesting cricketing stories

Well, I've got one for ya's

I've played rep cricket with the same bunch of boys for about 5 years running now and whenever we play another team in club cricket with some rep boys in it there's a right old sledge fest (nothing harsh) and I was saying as one of the guys was walking out to bat
"here we go there an easy wicket here"
and he got out the first ball he faced, I took the catch.

they posted 160ish which we were pretty confident we could get and so we went out a little bit cocky, I was batting second drop and our opening pair were there for a long time, one ended up on 67 and the other on 42 so when they were both out and i came in there was about 20-30 runs to make.
so As i'm making my way out I here my mate in the other team start carrying on like i did about it being an easy wicket and sure as anything I got out first ball by hitting it straight down his throat, and all i could do was laugh, and after the game everyone was telling the both of use that maybe next time we shouldn't be such smartarses, but I think we will no matter what...
 
Re: Your funniest/most interesting cricketing stories

Accidentally went out to bat with a phone in my front pocket. Ball hit me whilst I was on the back foot, missed the thigh pad, hit the phone, and I got given LBW. When I got off the field I noticed the phone in my pocket for the first time, and then also discovered that it was completely smashed.
 
Re: Your funniest/most interesting cricketing stories

Not sure that funny is the word, strange is probably closer. Played a tour game against a team called Fleetwood back in 1997. Their overseas player was Jimmy Maher and for some reason he attracted the Canterbury Bulldogs rugby league team (who had been playing in the World club challenge) to turn up and watch him.

Anyway, about 10 overs into the game we get the sight of about 20 6ft tall, 7ft wide professional rugby players doing a naked lap of the boundary followed by the customary jump over the stumps, one after the other. Like I said more strange than funny but that is what tour games tend bring.
 
Re: Your funniest/most interesting cricketing stories

Some truly great stories there.

Here is one of my favourite moments in my cricket.

I'd been playing seniors for 2 and a half years, made it to Reserve (B) Grade and was trying my heart out to get a spot in the A Grade side. I was having a good season, and sure enough I was rewarded with a spot after the A Grade spinner was involved in a car accident and was out for the rest of the season. On the Sunshine Coast where I was playing, getting to A Grade is a big thing, we have the second biggest cricket comp in the state and I was very excited about my chance. I was, and still am, quite young and whenever I'm on the field, you wouldn't imagine the sort of stick I get from the other players. Anyway, that isn't the story.

We were playing a 50 over match, and I had no idea what is happening as we get off the team bus and head to Maroochydore's second field, and put my kit down over the side and just took in the sites of a very proffesional outfit. I was thinking this wasn't normal, and the I heard why. My captain told me that the first time in three years (this being 2006) Ashley Nofke was coming back to this grade after suffering a double blow of injury and came back and ended up playing an A Grade match and then played with the Scorchers Grade side before going back to state duties, as a warm up. I thought this was great, I get to meet and play with one of my heroes of the modern game. That was until I discovered he was on the other team.

Almost everyone else there had against with him before, and they all had their stories about being part of his record breaking summer where he averaged 5.5 wickets per innings, an average of 4.3 from 11 games. We were sitting pretty on the bottom on the table that year, and everyone was a tad nervous about facing a bowler picked to tour with the Australian team for the Ashes. He is also the fastest bowler in the region, known to get the odd one up to 145 km/h.

We batted first, and sure enough Nofke bowled the first over. He looked a little sluggish and we figured it was from his injury, this match being like a therapy treatment. The opener edged the first ball, only for second slip to drop it, a pretty tough chance it was. He then went on to play and miss, block and leave the next five balls to survive the over.

The other opener was relieved to not have to face him, and went on the march. 12 runs later he faced the last ball of the over, which he hit what should have been a single down to fine leg, but called a very, very stern no and sent the other batsman back unwillingly, he already had made it three quarters the way down the pitch with his eyes bolging, trying to get off strike for the next over. Back he went, seeming like he wanted to get run out. All was safe though, and he faced up the next over.

First ball next over went for six. Bouncer, he got a top edge and it flew away. Next ball took out leg stump. He walked off and told the next batsman coming in that if he had any confidence then he was to get rid of it before he faced his first ball so he didn't feel bad about himself. He survived that over, even getting a single (big deal). Looked alright. This is our number three, nicknamed Bill. He now plays for Queensland 2nds and it showed that day why.

Nofke bowled one more over after that, getting the other opener with another bouncer aimed at the throat, he jumped back and managed to edge the ball straight up in the air for the keeper. Then he went off the field limping a little. Our team was literally jumping for joy, thinking we may be able to win now. Things went as the normally would, a pretty average game. Over 25 came up and we had 102 runs with 4 down, Bill on 41. Next over came a spinner, who got two wickets. 6/105. I was batting 10 that day, and was half hoping I wouldn't have to go out there.

One more wicket fell, then came a cheer from the couple of hundred who came down to watch Nofke. He came back onto the field. Next over Bill faced out, getting 2 from it, edging a ball just short of second slip. Over 30 came up. I was shaking in my seat, next in and extremely nervous about facing an Australian bowler. Bill was keeping the strike, and brought up his 50 off a slow (for him) 83 balls.

Nofke didn't bowl the next over, seemed to be testing his leg out in the outfield instead. The spinner came on and got the number 9 caught dead in front.

Out I came, hoping that I could manage to somehow get out of facing Noffers. Had a chat with Bill, had batted with him a lot before, him coming up the ranks as the same age as me. I batted out that over, getting two runs and really running hard, trying to push our score above 200 for the match. Next over came a medium pacer, Bill getting 14 from the over, good over, but left me on strike for the next one.

On came my biggest fear... good old Wombat stretching at the top of his mark. I had never faced above 130, and that was only in the nets. Plus (the were exagerating) apparently it was swinging about 2 metres then seaming in the opposite direction about half the pitch.

First ball came in, good line and length. I was almost behind the stumps as my first movement was well back. I played well inside the line and he beat me, going through to the keeper.

Second ball swung into my pads, just getting the faintest of nicks (I think) as everyone appealed for LBW. Umpire either was good enough or just felt sorry for us and gave me not out.

Third ball I had a brain fade, it was outside off and I swiped at it. Got the edge and went straight to second slip... only for it to pop back out again. Nofke looked a little fired up now. At this point I felt like shaking the guys hand and promptly leaving the ground, the city and maybe even the state.

Fourth ball was full on the stumps. I thought in the split second I had to think, oh full one, drive it for four. I got the bat about half way down from my back lift before the ball flew into it, then straight into the pitch and straight back into the air. Safe.

Fifth ball was good line and length. Play and miss on the back foot, from what should have been a front foot leave. He really looked angry now, I'm a number 10 and I had survived 5 balls against him.

Last ball of the over. I almost ran off the field to empty my pants, but put up with the discomfort. I was determined to show this show off what I was made of. I'd survived this long, I was the best batsman in the world. Hell, I'd hit him for six.

I was expecting full on the stumps again, since it almost worked last time. In his delivery stride and took a step forward ready to hit it straight back at him. Too busy premeditating I was to even notice where the ball had pitched. I caught site of it when it was about two metres in front of me. And by in front of me I meant in front of my face. The ball crashed straight into my helmet and I went down, hitting the ground before the ball did. I looked up to see Nofke knealing beside me, taking my helmet off. When I looked like I could talk he was apologising profusely, saying he didn't notice I was as young as I was. I was carried off on a stretcher, with Nofke taking one of the sides. When I was off, I was checked over by our first aid officer and coach, and said I should go down to the hospital for a look, but I felt alright. Nofke was still apologising.

It was then that started a good friendship between Wombat and I. We exchange emails every few months if he's not busy, and he's been helping me with my cricket. He's one very nice guy, and to this day I have that helmet hanging on my wall, with big dent just above the attachment for the face guard on the left side.

Others have faced the same quality bowling at the same level before, but nothing was like that day. The Sunshine Coast has produced state cricketers before, but never has another player had such an affect on the region. He has single handedly worked to put 2 million dollars into the cricketing economy here, and everyone that meets him is star shocked, and at the same time scared that they will have to face him. He is a brilliant bowler to come from such a good area, and to face him and survive will leave me with memories forever.

That is my favourite memory in cricket.
 
Re: Your funniest/most interesting cricketing stories

Wow, what a story. @|

It's pretty funny though that your most favourite memory in cricket is being hit in the head by Ashley Noffke and then getting taken off the ground by a stretcher. Just sayin'. :D
 
Re: Your funniest/most interesting cricketing stories

:D:D

Knocked arse over head by Nofke??

What bullshit....he is a good Western Australian boy;)

Loved it mate, that is a ripper.

I have been lucky enough, due to the old Dongara Cricket Clubs pro-active fundraising policy to have played, ( in a double wicket competition format), with Roo Yardley, Kim Hughes, Doug Walters.....the piss drinking rumours are so very true.:D..... and FOT.

Even though FOT was in his 40's I was still quite nervous in facing our greatest ever fast bowler....

Off a 10...it looked like 30, pace run I played a lovely front foot cover drive.
Unfortunately the ball swung out, cut back, reverse swung and did some sort of zooter and I missed it.

The next ball?Well, he simply bowled me, neck and crop, with a straight one.

He bought me a beer afterwards and I still have that stubby.
 
Re: Your funniest/most interesting cricketing stories

mas cambios;383814 said:
Played a tour game against a team called Fleetwood back in 1997.
Biggest shed ever last time i went there, i know you went 13 yrs ago but i bet that wasn't the best tour game ever.

Tour cricket : Went swansea with me dads team (we play for different clubs now but i used score for them) and it was a pretty terrible experience , poor weather, welsh ppl, swalec was closed etc etc... but on last night we decided try make a go of it so the older lads went to cardiff for a piss up and the rest of us went cinemas and bowling etc,,, so wake up in morning and one of lads who went into cardiff (he is a proper gobshite but funny) is running around the hotel corridor in y-fronts yelling this womens name we've never heard of before so the hotel manager calms him down, gets him dressed and then kicks the whole party out. So where on the coach and this lad isn't talking to no one and he looks down and where all like " cheer up it was a one night stand" the usual. When we got back to the club he started cryin and we where more worried now... " I hired a welsh prostitute, she robbed my wallet (£400+ in with all creds and cards), phone and ipod" to say we werent sympathetic was an understatment and i don't think hes ever bowled a spell were it hasnt in some form popped up.
 
Re: Your funniest/most interesting cricketing stories

Ljp86;383876 said:
Wow, what a story. @|

It's pretty funny though that your most favourite memory in cricket is being hit in the head by Ashley Noffke and then getting taken off the ground by a stretcher. Just sayin'. :D

Hahaha I guess so.

My favourite more so in that I got to play with him. Still got a scar above my left ear from it too.

It's a big deal playing with an international player, even a bigger deal when you are 16 at the time.

I have full respect for any international batsman. 130 is fast enough, let alone 160 km/h at the most. And there are people that hit 155ers over the rope. Simply astonishing.
 
Re: Your funniest/most interesting cricketing stories

Two funny stories that I have seen in my cricketing life time.

Story 1:

I have a pretty strong throwing arm, if I can say so myself. I play Baseball occasionally, no longer competitively but I did at one stage, and came through as a reasonable pitcher and short stop when I wasn't plying that trade. These both require some very strong and accurate throws, and for anyone doubting their fielding ability, see if there is any baseball happening in town and you will be fielding wonders for life. They will have anyone throwing like Symonds. Not bragging or anything, but I have gone from a 90 km/h throw (pretty average) to now a 120 km/h (125.6 was my best in front of a speed gun). I can throw from one boundary to the other on pretty much any ground I am at, and not going the vertical route either, flat throws everywhere. So much so has baseball helped my arm that the bowlers have banned me from returning throws to their end, because I tend to get carried away showing off, and then breaking hands.

This all came into perspective when one day I was fielding at mid off. I was a bit deep and the batsmen thought it funny to hit it to me and steal singles while the captain was telling me not to shy at the stumps for a run out if I wasn't sure they were going to be out because everytime I would conceed an over throw as there was nobody to back it up. So I would pick up the ball and just lob it back to the bowler while they made their cheeky runs.

One time the batsman set off a little late, and since they were snickering at the captain telling me off earlier, I thought I'd have a go throwing down the stumps and getting the little ************** out. The ball came straight to my right hand and what I call the perfect throw uprooted leg stump, he was a metre out of his crease.

It was what happened to that stump that made it a very funny occasion. The stump flew out of the ground, bounced once and flicked up straight into the grill of the batsman's helmet. The pointy end of the stump was lodged in there and he ran a few metres with a stump in his helmet.

So angry was he that he walked half way back to the boundary before he dropped it on the ground. Nothing was hurt but his pride.

Story 2:

There was one average game where nothing great was happening. We have one very funny player in our side that makes for a fun match whatever is happening.

We were fielding, and a boundary was hit. This funny guy jogged after the ball to retrieve it, it had rolled just down a hill and against a fence, which seperated the ground from the road. Such was the drop that if a player walks down there the disappear from view.

After a minute of him not returning, another guy jogged over there to see if he could find the ball. He stopped when he got the rise and burst out laughing.

There was the resident funny man, sitting under a tree just down the road a little bit in a small park on a bench seat, chatting up one very good looking girl. All the little flirtatious things were happening, and as such the whole of both teams had gathered at the top of the rise overlooking the small park and watched as he pulled all the moves.

After a couple of minutes we got a little impatient, wondering where he put the ball. We found it - he had put it in his pocket. After another ten seconds someone piped up "Are you sure that's actually the ball... it looks a little suspicious". Everyone was in tears.

Finally we decided to all gather and sit on the grass directly behind them, able to hear what they were talking about.

It took all of a timed 2 and a half minutes for him to notice he had gathered a crowd, at which point he remembered he was meant to be playing a game of cricket.

He came back on to the field blushing and with a bit of paper with the girls number on it.

You wouldn't believe the sledges that everyone, including teammates, gave him for the rest of the match.

It was a classic moment.
 
Re: Your funniest/most interesting cricketing stories

playing in my first season of cricket proper i was still learning to walk the game, in a match previous to this i claimed a 6 for, with 3 in 4 balls, albeit against a depleted team.

playing a 2 game weekend, i was picked for the following game to, even asked to open the bowling at the time (i was then a seamer, having now switched to an offie). I got smashed for 19 in the over and didnt bowl again. not a good start for a team looking to defend 181 in 45 overs.

Being taken off, we brought on our elite player - the man hit 141 of our runs, who eeked out wickets at a regular - 4 of them. he wheeled of his alotment of 10 in one go but we still werent looking too healthy.

At the other end we had our captain, and later our most senior player, and i mean senior :p who restricted things a bit, only for our young ones to lose the plot a little.

with three overs to go, 4 runs were needed by our opponents. our captain did something that beggars belief - he brought one a young lad, no older than 11 to bowl this final over against a team just below us in the league (we had sneaked into a promotion spot)
the first ball was a leg side one that went for a bye, the second a dot. The last pitched on a good length on off, the batsman - their stalwart - took the biggest of swings ... all we heard was the crash of timber.
the young lad ran round in circles before being mobbed by the whole team. when we let him escape from our huddle the poor kid was crying.

was a HUGE let off for me, and a great moment for him im sure. was the sort of thing that makes cricket the only game i wna play
 
Re: Your funniest/most interesting cricketing stories

Got another from the archives...

I didn't play last season due to work (my boss wouldn't let me have Saturdays off) so I had to be content with playing indoor cricket on Thursday Nights. Anyway, my best friends were all playing in the same grade at the time and they had an away game which was about 40 mins away from our home ground by car. So, they decided they would all go to the match in the one car to save fuel.

It was a very hot day, almost 40 degrees and they rocked up to the ground for the game. Today's match was a one-day game, 40 overs per side which meant an earlier start. The club I play for has a range of different characters, you've got the ocker trades type people, the white collar bunch, uni students, metrosexuals as well as quite a few others. Terry (we'll call him by his nickname "Hobbo"), who has been at the club for ages is what you would call a bona fide nerd. Unfortunately, he hasn't had an easy childhood and he has a few mental problems, nothing too major but enough to cause friction in his homelife. Hobbo wasn't picked for today's game but showed up anyway as he is a clubman and shows up to some games even if he isn't playing.

My friends get to the ground and Hobbo shows up. Like I said before, Hobbo is a nerd, he's 32 and still lives at home and is a huge Star Wars fan so you kinda get the impression what he is like. As said previously, it was a really hot day and Hobbo rocks up wearing a full-length black trenchcoat which went down to his ankles. A couple of the guys were quite worried as it was really hot and also trying not to laugh at his ridiculous attire. He eventually joined the circle of guys chatting before the game and they all begin have a talk and a laugh. Then Hobbo tells everyone to look at what he is brought. He reveals one side of his coat and tucked inside are three replica lightsabres (plastic obviously), the ones used by the Jedis in the Star Wars films. I shit you not, he had three of them inside his coat. Amongst the weird looks he was getting, half our side were trying not to burst out laughing or trying to run away. Hobbo then went on,

"I tried to show that group of kids over there the ways of the Force but it would looks pretty dodgy to the police if I went over to them and pulled out my lightsabre."

By now, most of our side was either laughing or was trying to refrain from doing so, Hobbo looked utterly ridiculous but alas the game went underway and eventually finished. Watto, one of the players in our team had managed to steal one of Hobbo's lightsabres whilst our side was batting as Hobbo had taken the coat off due to the heat. My friends had decided to go through a drive-through bottle shop and pick up a few roadies for the drive back to the club. The drive home included going along the Graham Farmer Freeway which is a small road that helps traffic bypass the city so they head east and not have to go through the Perth CBD. The Freeway includes a small tunnel which is 1.6 km long (1 mile for those who still haven't yet reached the 21st century ;)). Watto had this lightsabre and spotted a girl driving in the tunnel alongside them on her mobile phone which is a traffic offence in WA. So, he winds down the window and under the influence of a few drinks begins waving this lightsabre at her car yelling at this girl to get off her phone. The girl was so startled at this drunk guy yelling abuse with a sword in his hand she dropped the phone and quickly sped off much to the laughter of my friends. They tried to catch up but couldn't so Watto spent the rest of the drive with the sword waving it at random cars until they got back to the clubrooms.

Just another weird and wacky story playing cricket!
 
Re: Your funniest/most interesting cricketing stories

2 stories, one was a few years ago and i had somehow left my 'abdominal protector' to be pc at home. I reckon, well, i'm a tailender, so i wont really need it, and what does the third ball do? hit me square in the nuts. I managed to make about 15 before getting out, but it was one of the most painful things to happen to me in my life.

The other is one man, whose initials are GW (just in case). This man is nearly 60 years old, a life member with about 700 games under his belt, and likes nothing more than a friendly c grade game on a sunday. This will unfortunately be his last year at the club as a player and he has taken a truckload of wickets this year, but tree occasions stand out. First, playing a game, he is'nt a quick runner and was 1/4 the way to the wicket he was running to when soeone tried to run him out. he gave up and started walking, but they missed, then missed again, then again. he managed to make the run.

The other times are twice in a row, where he has hit a 4 in the last overs to win us the game. If you saw this man you wouldnt think much of his batting, and if you batted with him you would think less, but he is one lucky man
 
Re: Your funniest/most interesting cricketing stories

Seen someone bowled, yorked on the second bounce...
 
Back
Top